Sidewalks

Author: yachnaa

  • Let’s Bring Back Writing Love Letters

    Let’s Bring Back Writing Love Letters

     

    While cleaning my room the other day, I stumbled across an old box full of handwritten love letters, postcards, and greeting cards I have saved since childhood.

    I spent the entire evening reading through them, and it was such an emotional and heartwarming experience.

    The fact that some of these letters were from people no longer in my life made me even more sad. Still, after reading them, I felt so much love and gratitude, as though nothing had changed.

    I can’t quite explain it, but receiving a hadnwritten love letter written just for you makes my heart so warm and full.

    Unlike a text or a DM, a love letter is special—it’s like holding onto a piece of someone’s heart. As texting and sharing memes devour the world, the old-school charm of a handwritten love letter is starting to feel like a distant memory or an endangered species.

    So, in today’s blog post, I am bringing back the lost art of writing handwritten love letters. Grab your cozy blanket and a hot cup of cacao, and let’s write love letters that’ll make hearts melt:

     

    1. Start with something sweet

    Start the letter with something by addressing them with something sweet. You could use a cute nickname you’ve given them or something that feels natural to your relationship.

    This could look like:

    “My Dearest [insert cute mushy nickname],”

     

    2. Write from your heart

    Drop all the pretense and write what’s really in your heart. Be honest and sincere. Write about how they make you feel, things you love about them, things they do to make you feel loved, and specific things about them that make you crazy in love with them. Don’t be afraid to be a little cheesy and corny—love letters are the perfect place for it!

    This could look like:

    “Every day, I fall more in love with you. I love your smile and the thing your forehead does when you’re mad at me. I love to hear you talk about things you love because I can see the passion in your eyes. And I love that you always know what to say to make me smile. You make life magical.”

     

    3. Write about your favourite memories with them

     I love to surprise my boyfriend with love letters often. I’ll start by going through photos of our time together, which helps with remembering the small things we’ve done together that might not stick out immediately in memory. When I reflect on those memories and feel gratitude and happiness from my partner, the letter starts to write itself.

    So, bring back those golden moments you’ve shared, whether it’s your first date, a last-minute road trip to a new city, or just an ordinary day made extraordinary by their presence.

     

    This could look like:

    “I still remember our first date when I spilled wine all over you AFTER calling you clumsy. The first time you held my hand while we were in the car, I felt my heart skip a beat. That night, we slow danced to the romantic playlist you made for me. That evening at the beach, when we sat silently beside each other watching the beautiful sunset, I knew I had found something special.”

     

    4. Add a little humor

    Don’t take this too seriously; be a little funny. Share an inside joke or a funny incident that only the two of you understand. It’ll bring a smile to their face and remind them of special moments you shared.

    This could look like:

    “Do you remember the first time you tried to make me a homemade pizza for our fifth date? You had never made pizza before and wanted to do something special for us. It ended up with pizza sauce exploding on the walls and the kitchen covered in flour. We ended up ordering takeout. At that moment, I realized I could spend hours with you without getting bored.”

     

    5. Write about your dreams and hopes for the future

    Write about something you’d like to experience with them. Like a trip to Spain, or something more fun like joining a pasta-making class together. Whatever you dream and hope of doing with them, express it to them and watch the magic unfold.

    This could look like:

    “I can’t wait to create new memories with you, from lazy Sunday mornings to starting a family. They say home isn’t a place. It’s a person. I spent my entire life looking for a dream home, and now I can finally say I am home.

     

     

    Bonus tips  to make your love letter extra special:

     

    • Choose Beautiful Stationery: I absolutely love cute stationery, and it’s such a bummer that stores like Hallmark have closed down. But there are many places online where you can pick a cute and pretty paper. You might want to go for something that reflects your personal style or something your partner will love.

     

    • Make it personal: After writing a love letter, my favourite thing to do is spray my favourite perfume on the paper so it smells wonderful like me and makes them miss my presence. You could add a little drawing, even if you’re bad at it. This gives a special touch to your letter.

     

    • Handwrite with Love: Your handwriting is part of the charm. So, don’t worry if it’s terrible; the effort and thoughtfulness will shine through.

     

    • Seal with a Kiss: Another of my favourite things is to seal the envelope with a kiss—literally! So, grab your red lipstick and kiss away.

     

     

    Yup, it’s really that simple. So, grab your pen and start writing. You’re welcome 😉

     

     

    xo

    Yachna

     

     

    Featured Image Credits- Pinterest 

     

    Note: If you buy something through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission or have a sponsored relationship with the brand, at no cost to you. We recommend only products we genuinely like. Thank you so much.

     

     

     

  • Things I Still Struggle With At 31

    Things I Still Struggle With At 31

     

    1. Comparing myself to other people

    Getting into the comparing game serves us nothing. I know that. And yet, I struggle with it often.   I have this terrible habit of comparing my life to those perfect Instagram posts of people my age partying in Switzerland with their picture-perfect outfits and accessories.  It’s not healthy to compare ourselves to people’s perfect Instagram shots. It’s like measuring our lives with someone’s perfectly edited and glittery shot—deceptive and unrealistic. No matter where we are in life, comparing ourselves to others is just not fair. We are doing ourselves a huge disservice. The only comparison we should have is with ourselves.

     

    2. Being content with how my body looks

    Society conditions women from birth to constantly focus on their appearance, which can be exhausting. Even at 31, I often get caught up in obsessing over my appearance. Whenever I look in the mirror, all I see is my big nose, acne-prone skin, crooked teeth, and skinny body, and the list keeps getting longer. Being a woman is so exhausting. This reminds me of a quote by Susan Sontag: “ Society’s scrutiny of the body often works to undermine women’s sense of self-worth and autonomy, making them prisoners of appearance.”

     

    3. Accepting my imperfect, oily, acne-prone skin.

    I constantly struggle with this, especially when I see the “how to have a glass skin” monologues everywhere.  I am sick and tired of it. Even though I know glass skin is fake, unrealistic and unattainable, I still find myself giving into the genius marketing tactics of buying more skincare in the hopes that one day my skin will be glass-looking. But the main question remains: why do we want to look like glass?  Glass skin reminds me of the creepy porcelain doll that may have a beautiful finish but is kept on a shelf to collect dust for years. No, thanks!!!

     

    4. Placing my self-worth on goals met.

    Ladies! Hear me out. This can be problematic. I have realized that goals are like moving targets, fleeting, and once we achieve them, we move on to the next. That way, I constantly rely on something outside me to fulfill me, which is problematic. Tying my self-worth to things like having 100k followers or making XYZ amount of money from my blog can turn the experience of pursuing my goals into a source of stress rather than a fulfilling part of my life.

     

    5.  Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable and accepting that life is one big grey area.

    You’ll never have all the answers, and your life will never be sorted out. Nobody has all the answers to this life. There are no rules to this thing. Life is unpredictable and rarely goes as planned, no matter how perfectly we plan out all the details.

     

    6. Both learning and struggling with how to heal from past stuff

    One of the biggest struggles of my life has been figuring out how to deal with the past trauma in my life in the healthiest way.  It takes a lot of courage and discipline to bridge this awkward and challenging gap of letting go of bad habits and working to build good habits that boost you up. 

     

    7. Struggling with life not turning out how I hoped it would

    Every now and then, I find myself grappling with the reality that my life hasn’t unfolded as I once imagined. The goals and timelines I set for myself were so ridiculous.  The best advice I ever received was that. Life isn’t about getting to the destination but about enjoying the journey. It’s about savouring each moment and embracing the magic that comes with unexpected twists and turns.

     

    8. Not taking things personally.

    “Everything is not about you” is a truth that can be as liberating as it is humbling. It’s like realizing that you’re not the star of every drama, and the world doesn’t revolve around your every move—surprising, I know!

    I struggle with this, but now I am slowly learning to embrace that I am not the main character in every story, and that’s fine. So, when things don’t go as I had planned, or someone’s projecting their shit on me, I remember: it’s not all about me. I am NOT the center of the universe, and that’s a good thing!

     

    9.  Responding instead of reacting.

    I am blessed with little patience. I have this terrible habit of losing my cool, which often leaves me feeling frustrated and drained, especially when I look back and think, “Why did I let that get to me so much?”

    It’s not just about losing my cool; it’s about its deeper impact on my relationships and my peace of mind. I constantly remind myself that reacting impulsively only adds to the chaos. What I really want is to pause, take a breath, and respond thoughtfully. But, as they say, old habits die hard; I am trying really really really hard to be more mindful of my interactions with people. 

     

    10. Jealousy

    I’m on a mission to ditch jealousy. I read somewhere that jealousy is the art of counting the other person’s blessings instead of your own. It’s just my insecurities projected onto others, and that’s seriously bad energy. I’m committed to flipping the script and focusing on my own growth.

     

    11.  Lastly, I’m struggling to learn that my 30s are still YOUNG.

    It really is!!

    We’re all conditioned into thinking that if we haven’t done XYZ by 25 or 30 at the latest, it’s worthless, or we’ve missed out on something, and it can’t be done. That’s simply not true. I never believed in this perspective.

    When I was 28, I left a career I had invested in for a decade with a very comfortable salary. I took a chance on myself, took the year off, and dared to build something new from scratch because I trusted my gut that “this just isn’t it.”

     

    ………………………………………………….

     

    Remember, what is for you will always find its way, and what is not, just smile and let it go. Best of luck to you! We got this 🙂

     

     

    If you’re comfortable, I want you to treat the comments section as your safe space. tell me what you struggle with. rant. Vent. and hopefully, just getting it out or seeing other people say they know exactly what you’re going through makes things a bit easier to deal with.

     

    Sending you all so much love.

     

    xo

    Yachna

     

     

    Featured Image –Pinterest.

  • People Are Sharing The Best Things They Learned in Therapy

    People Are Sharing The Best Things They Learned in Therapy

     

     

    Have you ever been to therapy?

    I recently stumbled upon a Bored Panda post where people share the best things they learned in therapy so that everyone could get some free therapy. It was just what I needed! I’m currently exploring free therapy options, and reading these nuggets of wisdom has been so uplifting.

    Here’s some of the best advice that really spoke to me-

    1. Never compare yourself to other people but even more importantly never compare yourself to fantasy versions of how your life would’ve turned out had you made a different choice. That’s the most dangerous mind game of all.

     

    2. Everyone needs a coping mechanism. There are bad ones (drinking, drugs, violence) and good ones (exercise, meditation, therapy). Pick a good one so you can avoid the bad ones, because we all have things we need to cope with.

     

    3. Anxiety is not the intuition.

     

    4. Pay attention to your inner child. When you feel yourself overreacting or getting triggered, she’s usually the source. Check in with her, ask her what she needs without judgement, give it to her, parent her, physically love on her and then send her off to play.

     

    5. Your experiences, your trauma, your pain, they are beads. And each experience complies a necklace we wear. But we are not our traumas. We are the string underneath.

     

    6.  If you can imagine the worst thing, you can imagine the best thing. Both things are imaginary. Say outloud verbally the positive outcome, repeat until it feels more real.

     

    7. The best thing a therapist ever told me is that society doesn’t need to set my schedule. I am allowed to eat breakfast at 11 and go to bed at 1 a.m. There’s no correct mold to fit; just find whatever works best for me.

     

    8.  Someone blaming their bad behaviour on something (their childhood, family, situation, etc.) only may be an EXPLANATION for their behaviour but it does not EXCUSE it. Don’t let anyone guilt trip you into feeling bad for them when they were the ones in the wrong.

     

    9.  Break everything down into smaller pieces. No, smaller. No, even smaller. The first step to taking a shower is walking to the bathroom.

     

    10. When meeting new people, don’t think about it as trying to get them to like you- think about it as trying to see if you like them/ if you get along with them. Rather than focusing on what they must be thinking about you, focus on what you think about them.

     

    11.  Avoid saying “should.” Its too easy to fall into pressuring yourself and pushing yourself too much. Reframe and rephrase. “I should excercise” —> ” I like how I feel after I excercise”, “I should do laundry” —-> “I deserve clean clothes.”

     

    12.  “How do you process all of the negative feelings that are projected at you?” and he said, “They aren’t my feelings.”

     

    13.  I was discussing with my therapist that although I’m still young, I felt like it was too late to achieve what I wanted my life to be. She very seriously looked me in the eye and said “Are you dead?” “Well….no” “Then there’s time” and it’s a motto I’ve been reminding myself of daily.

     

    14.  Anger is a secondary emotion. If someone is angry, they were something else first. That’s why we say, “try to understand where they’re coming from.” It means literally look for the origin of their anger, and speak to the initial emotion, not  the anger itself.

     

    15.  There are two ways people grow from trauma:

    • a) they went want anyone to feel as bad as they did ever again.
    • b) they want everyone to feel as bad as they did because its unfair they went through it and others didn’t.

    Be the first person.

     

    16.  Anger is sadness’ bodyguard.

     

    17.  You’re never spending time by yourself, you’re spending time with yourself. You are good enough to spend time with, even if its just you.

     

    18.  Sometimes you don’t deserve closure. The people you’ve hurt don’t owe you forgiveness even after you’ve changed for the better. Some bridges are burned forever, and sometimes its better that way for all parties. You have to move forward and be better for you, not someone else.

     

    19.  Decisions do not have to be labelled right or wrong. You made a choice that you believed was best based on the information you had at that time. When/if your future self discovers new info that changes your mind, that doesn’t mean you’ve failed or made a “bad” choice.

     

    20.  Your brain is responsible for keeping you alive, not keeping you happy. You have to be intentional about bringing joy into your life.

     

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    What do you think? What would you add? Sending hugs, empathy and unconditional respect out to anyone who needs it :*

     

     

    P.S.

    16 Things Every Person Should Do for Themselves Once a Year

     

     

    (Photo by Pinterest)

     

     

    Note: If you buy something through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission or have a sponsored relationship with the brand, at no cost to you. We recommend only products we genuinely like. Thank you so much.

     

     

  • How to EXIT Your lazy & Unmotivated Era

    How to EXIT Your lazy & Unmotivated Era

     

     

     

     

    It all began a few months ago…

    I would wake up feeling exhausted despite getting a good night’s sleep. From there, things spiralled into a constant battle to get out of bed and a general lack of motivation.

    Naturally, my to-do list seemed to grow longer by the day, and I was overwhelmed by work and home obligations. I felt like I was forcing myself to keep going when all I really wanted to do was nothing. But even when I did allow myself some downtime, I couldn’t shake the stress of everything I still needed to do.

    You may have noticed huge gaps in the last months where I didn’t post despite already having so much written out. Most days, I procrastinated by watching movies or mindlessly scrolling through my phone, which only made me feel worse about myself.

    Then, there was a turning point.

    I finally decided enough was enough and decided to make a change. I felt horrible about neglecting things that were important to me, like my blog. Eventually, I found my way out of that lazy and demotivated state.

     

    Here are SEVEN tips that got me out of my lazy and unmotivated era-

     

    1. Journal-

    Are you actually lazy, or do you just have invisible barriers that make it hard to get stuff done & make you feel stuck?You have to be aware of whether you are actually “lazy” or struggling with something mentally that requires more than just “pulling yourself together.” Sometimes, being stuck has a deeper meaning. Pull out your journal and ask yourself, ” What are the situational factors holding you back?” “What steps can you take to improve it?” You’ll never know the real cause if you don’t take the time to be self-aware.

     

    2. Set clear goals

    Before you prioritize your tasks, it’s important first to establish what truly matters to you. Setting clear and SMART goals will give you the direction you need. Your goal should be challenging yet attainable; you’ll want to provide a specific timeline and focus on getting real results. Once you’ve set your goal, list all the tasks to help you reach it. Remember, having too many tasks can lead to burnout, so prioritization is key.

     

    3. Eat that frog

    Finish the bigger or high-effort task first to free up the rest of the day for others. This has been a game-changer for me. If you’re feeling unproductive, it might simply mean you can’t prioritize because you have too much to do. It all boils down to a basic question: “Which task do you think you wish you did first but aren’t doing?”

     

    4. Prioritize

    Many experts recommend taking a moment to consider two important questions when tackling your tasks: Is this urgent? Is this important? Remember to prioritize urgent and important work, then move on to important tasks.

     

    5. Exercise

    is one of the best ways to exit from an unmotivated or lazy state of mind.

     

    6. Face what you’re putting off.

    So, sometimes, I find myself in situations where I have to tackle something new and out of my comfort zone. And you know what? Instead of diving in, I have this terrible habit of stressing and procrastinating. But I’ve realized that once I actually start the task, the procrastination just melts away. So, put down your email and chat, turn off notifications, and get to work. You’ll be much happier once you’ve crossed it off your list.

     

    7. Time Blocking is your friend

    Back in 2020, I came across this awesome technique called the Pomodoro method. It’s all about studying for 25 minutes and then taking a 5-minute break. If procrastination isn’t really an issue for you, feel free to adjust the Pomodoro to suit your style. Oh, and my friend John absolutely loves the Forest app – he says it’s a game-changer for staying productive and removing distractions.

     

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    The tips described in this blog worked for me. If they worked for you, let me know. If something else worked for you, share it in the comments!

     

     

    (Photo Credits- Pinterest)

     

     

     

    Note: If you buy something through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission or have a sponsored relationship with the brand, at no cost to you. We recommend only products we genuinely like. Thank you so much.

     

  • How I Manifested The Man Of My Dreams

    How I Manifested The Man Of My Dreams

     

    In the summer of 2022, I was single and frustrated with the chaotic dating scene of my life. I was tired of men playing games, sending mixed signals, and ghosting. It was all too exhausting for me to put up with.

    After a particularly discouraging experience with a guy I was talking to, I wrote down a list of all the qualities I wanted in my dream man. Little did I know that this journal entry would change my life.

    Fast forward a month or two, and I meet the love of my life – my best friend, completely unexpectedly. Our relationship is beyond anything I could have imagined. It’s like the universe conspired to bring us together. It’s more than anything I could have scripted, prayed for, or even thought about. I let go of any expectations and trusted the universe, and boy, did it deliver!

    Looking back at my journal entry, I was shocked to see how everything fell into place exactly as I had written. It made me truly understand the power of thoughts and manifestation.

    So, let’s get into how to manifest like a pro.

     

    1. Get clear on what you want, and be as specific as possible.

    I’ve always been a die-hard romantic at heart, never one for casual dating or hookups. It just doesn’t sit right with me. As an INFJ, I seek depth and authenticity in my connections. So, I have always visualized a healthy, long-term relationship for myself and wrote the emotions I hoped to feel when in that relationship.

    For example, I hope to feel completely safe and understood in my relationships. In addition to that, I like to surround myself with people who will always uplift and empower me. What kind of emotions are you hoping to feel in your ideal relationship? Write it down.

     

    2. Do what best feels natural to you

    I love bringing my desires to life using scripting, affirmations, and vision boards. When I script, I always write as if my dreams have already come true. The important thing is to do what feels most natural and exciting for you so you can enjoy the manifestation process.

     

    3. Take action steps in your day-to-day life around it.

    Another way to meet the universe halfway is to do your part. In sticking with the relationship analogy, I wanted a meaningful, long-term connection, so I stopped wasting time on those whose goals didn’t align with mine. Break up with the person you’re staying with because you’re scared to be alone.  Take that leap of faith that affirms you believe it’s real. Dress up, go out with your friends or take yourself out on dates, have fun, be confident, and meet new people. Doing this allows the universe to bring the right person into your life. This is called doing the footwork for the universe.

     

    4.  Focus on feeling and visualizing

    Here’s a brilliant manifestation tip that my friend shared with me. She used it to manifest her perfect partner. Picture yourself experiencing all the glorious details of your dream relationship—the laughter, holding hands, cooking together, or strolling on the beach—whatever symbolizes the ultimate relationship bliss to you.

    The key is to immerse yourself in the vision by adding as many details as possible: the sights, sounds, smells, and most importantly, the feelings. Feel the joy of that deep connection, freedom, safety, and love with that person. The focus should be on the emotions this connection stirs within you.

    Getting caught up in the shallow details of their physical appearance can be limiting, and asking for “man in finance, trust fund, blue eyes” might bring you a gorgeous jerk … again. So, stay open to the surprise the universe has in store for you.

     

    5. Reprogram your mind to attract goodness and live in the end. 

    Know that you’re worthy. Remind yourself of all the goodness within you and all the beauty you already have. When manifesting, do it from a place of feeling complete and deserving, not from a place of lacking or feeling needy. You are loved and cherished by the universe. Come from this place of power and deep connection.

     

    6. Don’t go looking for love; be the love you want in your life, and it will come to you

    Fall in love with yourself first. Only then, you’ll be able to give someone else your unconditional love.

     

    7. Act as if you already are or have something despite what your world shows you.

    Feel it in your bones that your wish is coming to life. Detach yourself from the desperation and restlessness of needing it now. Surrender it all to the mystical universe, which knows when to deliver it in the perfect time and way.

     

    8. Always be grateful

    No matter where you’re in life, be aligned with the energy of gratitude.

     

    9. Become fully content within yourself

    If you want a partner who goes to the gym and cares for their health, you must be that person for yourself first. Similarly, if you’re looking for love, then fill your cup with that love first. In my case, I stopped looking for love. Not in an ‘I don’t need no man’ attitude, but rather, ‘I value love and relationships, but I am also very content in being single forever because I cherish my happiness and life.’

     

    Lastly, here are some of my favourite manifestation tools to add more sacredness to your wish.

     

     

     

     

    Note: If you buy something through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission or have a sponsored relationship with the brand at no cost to you. We recommend only products we genuinely like. Thank you so much.

     

    xo,

    Yachna

     

     

    Featured Image Credits- Pinterest 

     

  • Thoughts Everyone Has While Rewatching ‘Gossip Girl’

    Thoughts Everyone Has While Rewatching ‘Gossip Girl’

     

    I’ll never forget being a fashion-obsessed teenager when Gossip Girl first aired. It was love at first watch. Set in New York City, following the scandalous lives of elite high schoolers from the Upper East Side.

    I have to admit, it’s toxic, but oh so addicting! Back then, I wasn’t interested in watching characters grapple with morality. I lived for the drama, the scandal, and the fabulous lives of the rich, the hot, and the unapologetically evil characters on the show.

    Now, I’m knee-deep in my Gossip Girl rewatch and am just as obsessed as the first time. Something about this show pulls me in. Maybe it’s the consistently fabulous costumes or the because of such iconic cast. I mean, I can just look at Nate Archibald all day. The show has always held me spellbound, and I’m revisiting it for that exact reason.

     Rewatching the show as an adult in my thirties was completely different from watching it in my teens or early twenties, and here are all my thoughts.

     

    Note: I’d say spoilers, but if you haven’t seen Gossip Girl yet, that’s on you.

     

    1. The biggest WTF moment was trying to portray the Humphreys as poor. Come on, they live in a spacious loft in DUMBO, and Rufus was a successful art gallery owner and band member! With two kids in private school, they definitely aren’t struggling. Humphreys are at least solidly middle class, if not upper middle class.

     

    2. I couldn’t stop laughing during the pilot episode when Nate and Chuck were seen riding a public school bus. It still bothers me to this day! I mean, can you really expect me to believe that Chuck and Nate would ever ride a public bus to school? It made no sense at all, and they never did it again!

     

    3. VANESSA!!! Need I say more? I just don’t understand why Vanessa was part of the show. After watching the show again, I realized that if she weren’t in it, it would still be the same show. She did nothing but make me irrationally angry at all times and managed to get on every single one of my nerves. Honestly, she really should’ve just stayed in Brooklyn.

     

    4. Jenny Humphrey is the worst character ever. I just can’t get over how terrible Jenny Humphrey was in Season 3. She turned her back on her friend Eric to become queen bee and then threw yogurt on him! And then starts dealing drugs and stealing from Lily, who has always been there for her. And let’s not even get started on how she tried to steal Nate from Serena, who has always been accepting and supportive of Jenny.

    The worst thing Jenny did was just everything in Serena’s teacher plotline. Like, okay, Serena was mean to you one time, so you conspired with a crazy stalker to ruin her life, get her kicked out of college, and (unbeknownst to Jenny) roofied and framed for a drug overdose. That was really the moment I was done with Jenny and Vanessa.

     

    5. I will never forgive the writers for destroying Rufus and Lily!!! They were the only couple that made sense and should have ended up together.

     

    6. Nate and Serena were endgame. Why didn’t they end up together? It was literally SO obvious from the very beginning that they were meant to be together. I hate even pairing Nate with such a morally questionable character because he somehow happened to be the sweetest character. Still, they got along so well and had similar attitudes towards their lifestyle, and most importantly they had such a meaningful friendship.

     

    7. The show really did Nate dirty. His character had so much potential, but the writers just kind of dropped the ball on his development. Plus, let’s be honest: Nate is beautiful to look at. Sure, he may not have been the most exciting character, but at least he never betrayed anyone for his gain. But imagine if Gossip Girl turned out to be Nate; it would have added a whole new, dark layer to his character, especially considering his feelings of not belonging.

     

    8. I couldnt believe how unrealistic Blair’s wedding look was in Gossip Girl’s season five? With her impeccable fashion sense, her mom’s fame as a fashion designer, and all her wealth, it’s hard to understand how she ended up looking like that on her wedding day to an actual prince! I was expecting something more Grace Kelly-like from her, not the loose hair with a strapless white gown.

     

    9. Can we talk about how they suddenly stopped going to university? Like, why is no one attending classes?

     

    10. I don’t think Dan and Blair were thrown together for shock value. In fact, upon rewatching the show, I noticed they had one of the most refreshing friendships/relationships. They took the time to build a solid friendship in seasons 4 and 5 before getting together at the end of season 5. This kind of slow-burn development is rare in the show. When Dan wrote Louis’ vows, Blair said it was like he peered into her soul! Their friendship was more mature than many others on the show, and most importantly, they made each other genuinely happy in a healthy way.

     

    11. Serena and Dan’s endgame was rushed. It was like he was madly in love with Blair, and then five minutes later, it was Serena again.

     

    12. Can we just talk about how they’re like 15, and they’re drinking martinis at a hotel on a school night?? I can’t believe how much alcohol they consumed throughout the series, especially since they were all underage for the first few seasons. It’s pretty wild!

     

    13. Chuck and Lily’s relationship is the series’ highlight. I adored their relationship.

     

    14. In every episode, the things that go down are absolutely outrageous. Chuck Bass’s predatory behaviour is off the charts. And yet, despite all the toxicity, you find yourself inexplicably rooting for him. It’s like he’s that reformed bad boy who’s a total jerk to everyone except his one true love. Honestly, it’s like something straight out of a Wattpad fan fiction. Even as a teenager and fully aware of how toxic Chuck and Blair’s relationship was, I couldn’t help but cheer them on.

     

    15. Blair and Chuck may not have been innocent, but their character development was absolutely top-notch. Their storyline was hands down one of the most gripping and authentic in the entire series.

     

    16. Serena is the only character who never changed throughout the entire show. And every episode and season-ending, there she was, insisting, “I’m trying to change”!!!!! The way Dan portrayed her in his book as a shallow socialite seems accurate. I mean, having an affair with a politician at 20, not attending college, and not even working – just living off her family’s wealth? She should have stayed in LA and focused on her film career instead.

     

    17. I’ve always thought that NYC was the most important character in Gossip Girl and the one that continually saved it and made it interesting. Specifically, it was the elite bubble of NYC. The real estate and fashion porn, specific to NYC, in the show, is really what kept people hooked and coming back for more. The fantasy of it all, more so than the actual storyline, made the show the cultural zeitgeist that it was. People didn’t want to be Serena, Blair, or Chuck because they liked them as people; they wanted to be them because they loved how and where they lived. The same show, with the same storyline and characters, wouldn’t have worked elsewhere outside of wealthy New York.

     

    18. The strongest thing about GG was that all lead actors made their characters much more than they were on paper…every single actor/actress in Gossip Girl gave this story life.

     

    19. Blair Waldorf is hands down the most captivating character ever written for TV. She’s sharp-witted, manipulative, and unapologetically entitled. And I love her for it. BLAIR was the backbone of the show; every teen drama tries to replicate a “Blair” character but falls short.

     

    20. Let’s talk LOOPHOLES. Who was Chuck’s mother? What happened to her? And remember Lily and Rufus’ son, Scott? Whatever happened to him? He just…disappeared.

     

    21. Dan should never have been revealed as GG. The Gossip Girl should have always been Kristen Bell sending a text, breaking the fourth wall by winking at the audience, and then walking away down a busy NY street because she really is nobody and everybody.

     

     

    Have you re-watched a series like Gossip Girl that blew your mind, even though you’d already seen it? Let us know in the comments below <3

     

     

    xo

    Yachna

  • Can You Be Friends With Your Ex

    Can You Be Friends With Your Ex

     

     

    It’s a classic rom-com trope we’ve all seen a million times. We’ve listened to a million love songs about it. And we’ve probably used “the line” at one point or another: “Let’s stay friends, okay?”.

    The idea of being friends with an ex can be complicated. You’ve likely experienced unforgettable, life-changing memories and intimacy with this person, so naturally, there’s a temptation to keep them in your life. Or, you may also be part of the same friendship circle, so avoiding them could mean having no social life.

    I don’t stay friends with my exes, and I avoid dating men who are still best friends with theirs. That’s my opinion, of course; everyone is different. The reason is that after a breakup, I want to heal and move on with my life fresh, without any emotional baggage from the past.

    Healing and growth require a fresh start, free from reminders of past relationships. How can you truly grow if you have a constant reminder of your past mistakes around you, keeping you in a rut?

    Another reason is that some feelings never go away, which is disrespectful to their new partner and my current partner. When I was young and naive, I thought staying friends with my ex after our breakup was a brilliant idea. At the time, it seemed like a good way to ease my pain, even if it was just a temporary fix.

    Looking back, I realize how wrong I was. Trying to be friends only led to more heartache and confusion. It was a tough lesson, but I learned the hard way that staying friends with an ex is usually a recipe for confusion and emotional rollercoasters.

    That so-called “friendship” not only kept me emotionally stuck, but it also held me back from growing personally and moving forward in my new relationship. So, why keep investing in something that’s already over? It’s like watering a dead plant – what’s the point?

    Of course, when you have kids with the person, it’s a different thing; your life will be tangled forever, so it’s good to have a good relationship. I have friends who are friends with their ex-husband.

    Before you consider being friends with your ex, ask yourself these important questions: Can you still be friends with your ex when they fall in love with someone else? Someone you don’t like? Someone else in your friend circle? If you can’t maintain strong boundaries when your relationship is over, or if it causes emotional distress, you’re not prepared to be an actual friend.

    In my experience, lovers and friends can only happen once no romantic feelings are left and no one has a hidden agenda. If you (or the other person) have any hopes of getting back together, it’s very difficult to develop a real friendship.

    While writing this post, I asked some friends for their opinions. Here are some of their responses-

    “I’m very close friends with an ex. I get along great with their partner, it’s no big deal. But we were virtually no contact after the breakup for about a year and a half. That was a proper healing time. Jumping straight back into friendship after a few months, I’m skeptical.”

     

    “I would be friends with my ex after four years of relationship. Even then, I suspect something could have happened between us. I don’t know if I can be friends with my ex. Maybe friends with benefits, but just friends is a no for me.”

     

    ” I am friends with all my exes because they are my friends who know me well and have several years of history together. They are worth their weight in gold as confidants who know me well. I don’t understand wanting to walk away from that just because I used to have sex with the person. As long as you can maintain healthy boundaries, why throw away a good friend just because you used to date?”

     

    “Some people are too valuable and cannot just be tossed aside, especially if the connection is on a much deeper level than the physical intimacy. There is a mutual understanding and appreciation that is rare to find. What’s the difference between a romantic and a platonic relationship? The physical intimacy. Why does everything else also have to be thrown out the window?”

     

    That being said, there’s one ex with whom I am friendly. We don’t see each other or talk often. But when we meet, it’s always pleasant and a good time. And, of course, it helps we weren’t in touch with each other for years. Now he’s happily married, he has no interest in trying to “win me back” or whatever, and I have no interest in dating him again. So, for us, it’s pretty easy to be friends.

    If you decide to be friends with your ex, then boundaries must be discussed and enforced. You cannot just observe how things go. Here are some things I would not do with my ex ever:

     

    1. Go out to dinner with, or drink with, him one on one;
    2. Discuss any aspect of my intimate life with him;
    3. Go into detail or reminisce about our relationship together;
    4. Discuss any problems or issues in my current relationship with him;
    5. Give him advice on any of his relationships, etc;

     

    There’s no right or wrong answer to this question. However, I am very curious to know your opinion on this. Can you ever truly be friends with your ex? Comment below :*

     

    xo

    Yachna

     

    Featured Image Credits- Pinterest 

  • Venus in Pisces: A Romantic Playlist

    Venus in Pisces: A Romantic Playlist

     

     

    Hey everyone,

    I’m super excited to kick off my zodiac-inspired playlist series! I’ve always been passionate about both zodiac signs and music, so curating playlists based on zodiacs is a dream come true for me.

    I’m starting this series with a playlist inspired by my least favourite placement, Venus in Pisces. Having a Pisces Venus myself, I can tell you it’s not my top choice!

    Being a Venus in Pisces means I’m a total softy. I always try to see the best in people and am willing to go the extra mile for my loved ones. However, I also tend to get a bit too dreamy and overly romanticize my relationships. It’s a lot of “empathy without boundaries is self-destruction.”

    I love and struggle with having a Venus in Pisces because I tend to be a bit of an escapist, finding solace in books, movies, and anything else that can transport my mind to a whole new world.

    So, this playlist is about embracing the magical symphony of romance, love, and fantasy, just like my Venus in Pisces placement.

    I hope you enjoy this playlist as much as I do!

     

     

     

    xo

    Yachna 

     

    Are there any specific zodiac-inspired playlists you’d like me to create in the comments below?

     

    P.S.

    The 20 best Lana Del Rey’s greatest songs

     

  • How to Become a Morning Person

    How to Become a Morning Person

     

    Some people aren’t just naturally morning people (myself included).

    Being a night owl has been my natural rhythm for as long as I can remember. My most productive hours are late at night when everything is calm and quiet.

    I’ve realized that, as much as I enjoy being a night owl, I equally hate the feeling of wasting my day away. There have been many days where I woke up at noon, and it always left me feeling a bit down because I felt like I was missing out on my mornings.

    I used to have a messed-up sleep schedule from all my travelling, but now that I have finally settled down, I’m savouring a consistent routine.

    Waking up at 7:30 a.m. and prioritizing eight hours of beauty sleep has become my new goal. If you want to become an early bird like me, it’s all about practice and a positive mindset.

     

    Here are some tips that have truly made a difference in helping me embrace the morning-

     

    1. Go to bed early—This tip goes without saying but set an earlier bedtime so you can have good hours of peaceful sleep and wake up feeling like a beautiful princess.

     

    2. Keep your cell phone away from your bed. You’ll sleep better, and in the morning, it will also force you to hop out of your cozy sheets to turn your phone alarm off instead of snoozing.

     

    3. Avoid hitting the snooze button. “Just ten more minutes” is a slippery slope. End of story.

     

    4. Schedule a morning workout in your routine. One of the things that has worked best for me is scheduling a morning workout. Even if I am feeling lazy, I never skip it. It goes without saying that starting your day with exercise increases energy and improves productivity for the day.

     

    5. Instead of leisurely lying around in the morning, jump out of bed when you wake up. I like to make my bed right away, which stops me from getting back in. Seeing my bed neatly made when I get home evokes the same feeling of taking a nice, deep, satisfying breath of fresh air. It has been a game-changer for me. It’s a little ritual I do to make coming back home feel extra nice.

     

     6. Before you go to sleep, make a mental or physical checklist prioritizing your goals for the next day. This will help you wake up motivated to achieve that goal.

     

    7. Draw your curtains back when you leave bed and let the natural light in first thing in the morning.

     

    8. Stay Consistent. Remember that the habits you have now took years to form. Set reasonable goals and timelines to rewire them. It is not something that can happen in just a week or two. 

     

    9. Reward yourself. Take the time to celebrate the little wins. Whether you acknowledge them in your mind or jot them down, recognize and celebrate each small accomplishment. You totally deserve to feel proud of the progress you’re making towards a healthier lifestyle.

     

    xo,

    Yachna 

     

    What are some of your tips for becoming a morning person? I’d love to know in the comments.

     

    Featured Image Credits- Pinterest 

  • How To Maintain Friendships As An Adult

    How To Maintain Friendships As An Adult

     

     

     

    Last weekend, I attended my cousin’s baby shower, and it was absolutely fantastic!

    I couldn’t wait to reunite with friends I hadn’t seen in over two years. So much had happened during that time—marriages, new babies, and engagements—there was just so much catching up to do.

    Maintaining meaningful friendships can be challenging as we age. Meeting all my friends after so long made me nostalgic for those carefree days when we spent our days doing nothing together.

    When I got home that night, I realized that adulting and responsibilities had replaced our spontaneous hangouts and carefree last-minute trips. I felt sad to see how much time and changed and with it the dynamic of relationships.

    But no matter how busy we are, we must make time for healthy and meaningful connections to nourish our souls. Tight-knit connections are what make life worth living. 

    Although adult friendships are hard, it isn’t impossible with effort, thought, and intention. Here are some ways to make it work-

     

    1) Keep in touch frequently. I understand how hard it can be to reach out, living in our capitalist society that demands our productivity around the clock. I usually text or call someone when I am thinking of them. A simple ‘Thinking of you, hope all is well’ goes a long way. Staying curious about their lives will make maintaining friendships easier. Another fun way to keep in touch is to have an active group chat to share opinions on various topics and memes.

     

    2) Take the time to plan an in-person get-together. If you’re not a fan of phone conversations like me, setting a date to hang out in person can be a great way to keep in touch. Planning out the specifics of your get-together gives you both something exciting to anticipate and more reasons to stay connected.

     

    3) Focus on quality over quantity. Even though you may not be able to speak or see each other as often as you’d like, make it a point to dedicate the time you do have together to creating new memories together.

     

    4) Reciprocate the efforts. Nobody likes a one-sided friendship. Remember that everyone has responsibilities. Don’t let one person be the only one trying to maintain the connection.

     

    5) Celebrate the milestones, remember the small things, and be available for the hard times. Surprise your friend on her birthday. Make an effort to be present for milestones such as weddings, graduations, baby showers, or any celebration. After all, it is said that the best friendships stand the test of time and the ups and downs of life.

     

    6) Be honest. Ditch the silent treatment. Be open and honest in your communication. Don’t let petty misunderstandings get the best of your relationship. Create a safe space in your friendship to have difficult conversations openly and honestly without ruining the relationship dynamic.

     

    7) Have patience, and be there for them. The different life stages my friends and I are going through are pretty incredible. Some are embracing parenthood, some are jet-setting for work, and others are hustling to make their startup dreams a reality. It’s like we’re living parallel lives, but when we catch up, it’s like no time has passed.

    We understand and respect each other’s unique paths, which makes our bond even stronger. I understand that my friend with a newborn might not have time for long catch-up chats, and that’s okay. We adjust to our new role and support each other through the changes.

     

    ……………………………………..

     

    Lastly, I wanted to share my all-time favourite video from Winnie the Pooh, which always brings tears to my eyes. It beautifully captures the sentiment of realizing that growing up often means having less time to simply relax and enjoy moments with our loved ones. It’s a reminder that these small, seemingly insignificant moments actually take up the most space in our hearts.

     

    xo

    Yachna

     

    Do you have any tips on how to maintain adult friendships? I’d love to know in the comments 😀

     

     

     

    Featured Image- Pinterest