Sidewalks

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  • 10 Timeless Words From Books, Leaders, & Beyond

    10 Timeless Words From Books, Leaders, & Beyond

     

     

    How are you today? I was watching In The Bag with Emma Watson, and during the interview, she said something so wonderful and brilliant that it stuck with me. It inspired me to share it with you and other wise words from wise people. Here are 14 of my favourite quotes for whenever I need a dose of wisdom, and I’d love to hear yours too!

     

    “Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you’ll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you’ll hold on really hard and realize there is no choice but to let go. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.” ― Cheryl Strayed

     

    “When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.” ―Maya Angelou

     

    “When I’ve really been in love with someone, it’s not because they looked a certain way or liked a certain TV show or a certain cuisine. It’s more because when I watched a certain TV show or ate a certain cuisine with them, it was the most fun thing ever.” ― Aziz Ansari

     

    “Girls, if a boy says something that isn’t funny, you don’t have to laugh.” ―Amy Poehler

     

    “I tell people this a lot – go to the gym, and just sit there, and read a magazine, and then go home. And do this every day. Go to the gym, don’t even work out. Just GO. Because the habit of going to the gym is more important than the workout. Because it doesn’t matter what you do. You can have fun — but as long as you’re having fun, you continue to do it.” ―Terry Crews

     

    “Man does not simply exist but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become the next moment. By the same token, every human being has the freedom to change at any instant.” ― Viktor E. Frankl

     

    “You’re beautiful, but you’re empty…One couldn’t die for you. Of course, an ordinary passerby would think my rose looked just like you. But my rose, all on her own, is more important than all of you together, since she’s the one I’ve watered. Since she’s the one I put under glass, since she’s the one I sheltered behind the screen. Since she’s the one for whom I killed the caterpillars. Since she’s the one I listened to when she complained, or when she boasted, or even sometimes when she said nothing at all. Since she’s my rose.” ―Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

     

    “Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” ―Carrie Fisher

     

    “No is a complete sentence.” ―Elizabeth Olsen 

     

    “In uncertainty I am certain that underneath their topmost layers of frailty men want to be good and want to be loved. Indeed, most of their vices are attempted short cuts to love. When a man comes to die, no matter what his talents and influence and genius, if he dies unloved his life must be a failure to him and his dying a cold horror. It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try to live so that our death brings no pleasure to the world.”
    ― East of Eden

     

    “Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.” ―Mindy Kaling

     

    “You are imperfect, you are wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.” ― Brene Brown

     

    “You can’t always be in the reaping stage or harvest stage of life. Life has seasons.” ―Emma Watson

     

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    xx

    Yachna

     

    P.S.

    Timeless wisdom from The Little Prince  &  What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever read? 

     

     

     

     

     

  • A Day at The Dolce & Gabbana Exhibit

    A Day at The Dolce & Gabbana Exhibit

    If you know me, you know I’m all about fashion and will never pass up the chance to attend an exhibit. Last summer, when I was in NYC, I got to check out the Karl Lagerfeld Exhibit, and it was unreal—seeing his work from Chanel, Chloé, to Fendi was just mind-blowing.

    This summer, I had the incredible opportunity to spend a day at the Dolce & Gabbana Exhibit in Milan. Before my visit, I knew very little about the captivating story behind the iconic fashion house and its legacy. I mean, I knew they existed, but that was about it—nothing more.

     

    A Walk Through The Exhibit

    I still remember walking into that first room and being completely blown away. My friend and I looked at each other, mesmerized and speechless, like, ‘Are we seriously seeing this right now?’ I mean, when you look at the craftsmanship and the intricate details, you’ll see it for yourself, its NOT  just clothing; it’s art. 

     

    As the tour continued and we moved to the next room, we were completely absorbed into the world.

    I don’t even know how to put it into words—it was honestly mind-blowing. We spent hours wandering and talking about the pieces in every room, looking at each piece and admiring every tiny detail.

    The experience made me understand their legacy and history more deeply. I always knew clothing could be art, but I wasn’t expecting their work to be so artistic and complex. The beauty and drama of their creations were intoxicating. The theatricality of the exhibit—it just blew me away.

     

     

    A Love Letter to the Italian Culture

    One of the most amazing things about the Dolce & Gabbana exhibit was how much of their work was inspired by Italian culture, especially the colours and styles of Sicily. Upon entering the Sicily room, I was blown away by the . Everything in the room—from the colours to the clothes, feathers, jewelry, and paintings on the wall—was influenced by Sicily’s rich heritage. After the show, I did some research and found out that Sicily, where Domenico Dolce was born, has been a huge inspiration for the brand since the very beginning. You can really see the island’s sights, flavors, colors, and traditions woven into every piece in that exhibit—it was such a beautiful tribute.

     

     

    The Iconic Pieces

    If I had to pick my absolute favourites—though it’s nearly impossible because everything at the exhibit was mind-blowing—it would be these pieces. The level of detail that went into each creation was enough to make me fall in love instantly. These specific designs really stood out to me. I remember just standing there, completely mesmerized, admiring them from every angle. I found myself getting lost in every bead, every stitch, every bit of threadwork. The artistry was on a whole other level, leaving us in awe!

     

    Opulence in Detail

    The attention to detail in everything at the exhibit was absolutely mind-blowing! I was completely obsessed with how precise and intricate each piece was, from the clothes to the shoes and jewelry. I honestly could’ve stared at them for hours. It’s those tiny, thoughtful details that really impressed me and made me fall in love with the artistry behind each creation. The level of craftsmanship was just unreal, and it made me appreciate the hard work and creativity that goes into making these stunning pieces. I mean, the pictures don’t do justice to these creations. It was one of those things where you just had to be there to really feel the energy in the room. The atmosphere, the craftsmanship—it was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before. You could sense the passion and artistry in every piece, and no photo could fully capture that.

     

    The Art Behind the Fashion

    One of the coolest parts of the exhibit was being able to actually see the seamstresses and artisans working in real-time, right there in front of us. They had this pop-up workshop where you could watch them bring the garments to life, like a behind-the-scenes glimpse into the fashion house’s creative process. It felt like stepping into their real studios, and I even got a few photos of them working on the pieces, which was amazing to see up close! It made me appreciate the craftsmanship on an entirely new level. I truly believe the seamstresses are the real heroes!!

     

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    I left the Dolce & Gabbana exhibit with more than just admiration for beautiful clothes—I left with a deep respect for the artistry and creativity that goes into fashion. It’s no longer just about what we wear but about the stories we tell, the cultures we honour, and the emotions we express. That day at the exhibit opened my eyes in ways I’ll never forget.

    After the exhibit, my friend and I decided to grab some sushi, and we were still completely blown away by everything we had just seen. Neither of us had experienced anything like it before, and we both left inspired. We couldn’t stop talking about it over dinner, going on and on about the incredible designs, the craftsmanship, and how inspiring the whole day had been. It felt like we were on such a high from the experience!  It was just one of those days where everything felt so special—a day to remember.

     

    xo

    Yachna

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    Have you ever been to a fashion exhibit? What’s your favourite piece from the exhibit? Fashion lovers,  I’m curious—what piece would you spend hours staring at? Let me know in the comments, and let’s discuss the beauty of these creations together <3

  • Getting Over Romeo

    Getting Over Romeo

     

     

     

     

    I have always been a die-hard romantic. Growing up, I devoured romantic movies like candy. I remember crying ugly, messy tears while watching A Walk to Remember and The Notebook. Those passionate confessions of love under pouring rain were everything to me. And Romeo and Juliet? Their love story was the epitome of romance for my teenage self.

    As I started having crushes, I craved that all-consuming, fairytale love I saw in movies. But as I grew older and experienced my first heartbreak, the fantasy shattered.

    Suddenly, Romeo and Juliet wasn’t a romance—it was a tragedy about infatuated teenagers making terrible decisions. And don’t even get me started on romcoms. They’ve done more damage than good. One of the biggest lies they tell us is, “If he’s mean to you, it’s because he likes you.” That is the most toxic thing we can teach anyone. It sets girls up to tolerate poor treatment and tells boys it’s okay to be mean to girls.

    It’s no surprise that some of us end up in deeply unfulfilling relationships when we’re told that suffering is part of the deal. Somehow, we’ve accepted the belief that love must be intensely passionate, dramatic, and painful to be real. We’re constantly fed the fantasy that real love can magically fix everything. But in reality, relationships built on heightened emotions rarely stand the test of time.

    This weekend, as I sat in my room reflecting in my journal, I reread my thoughts: Why do we keep going back to people and relationships that bring us pain? Why do some of us keep ending up in unfulfilling relationships? Why do we hope against hope, even when it’s clear things aren’t going to change? Because we think love should be hard? We’ve been taught that suffering is a part of love. And that belief? It’s poison.

    We put all this effort into fixing things—sending another long text explaining our feelings, putting up with excuses, compromising time and time again—only to find ourselves back in the same place, asking for the same things a year later.

    Why don’t we cut our losses sooner? Why do we torture ourselves by staying in unfulfilling relationships? Why do we hope things will change when all the signs say otherwise? Why do we think one more apology will magically fix things? Why do we stay for the potential we see in someone rather than the reality they show us? How many times have you waited for that commitment that never came? It’s time to stop torturing yourself in the name of love.

    I recently watched Love You Zindagi, and Shah Rukh Khan’s character, Dr. Jehangir Khan, said something that hit me hard:

    “Sometimes we choose a difficult path only because we feel that to attain important things, we need to choose a difficult path. We think that it’s important to punish ourselves, but why can’t we choose a simple path? What’s wrong with that? Especially when we are not ready to face that difficult path.”

    This quote literally switched something within me. It’s so simple and yet so profound. We’ve been taught to glorify struggle as if it’s a badge of honour. Whether it’s a job, a relationship, or anything worth having in life, we think we need to suffer to prove our worth.

    I’ve stayed in relationships long past their expiration date. Looking back, I realized how much time I wasted trying to fix relationships that I knew weren’t right for me. If I could tell my younger self one thing, it would be this: you don’t have to settle for a love that hurts. Walk away when it’s not working—because the right love will never ask you to sacrifice your peace.

    No matter how rosy the beginning of the relationship was, it’s time to leave if it doesn’t fulfill you anymore. Most people don’t deserve a second chance, and some don’t even deserve the first.

    Love is not about intense burning desire or dramatic highs and lows. Neither should it send you to therapy. It’s about the everyday moments of calm and kindness. It’s about choosing to be with someone and finding comfort in consistency and predictability. But when we find someone like that, we freak out. We think it’s too easy and simple.

    So what do we do? We run back to the familiar pain of unfulfilling relationships because that’s all we’ve ever known. But why are we running away from something just because it’s not filled with drama and suffering?

    The only rule to live by when it comes to relationships is: are they kind to you? If they show promise but never deliver, it’s time to walk away. If they offer empty promises and apologies but never change, walk away. You don’t owe anyone suffering. Neither do you deserve it.

    Lastly, I am ending this post with something a dear friend once told me: “Love is supposed to strengthen you and build you, not break you into pieces.”

     

    xo

    Yachna

     

     

    Love should feel like peace, not pain. Drop a comment with one thing you’ll no longer tolerate in your relationships and let’s inspire each other to raise our standards.

  • Getting Over Girl Hate

    Getting Over Girl Hate

     

    Today, I want to talk about something that has been heavily on my mind and has repeatedly come up in my journal writing: Girl Hate.

    It all started when I first watched Cinderella as a little girl.

    In the movie, all the women are made to compete for the same prince, who can only pick ONE lucky girl. This leads to jealousy and resentment toward Cinderella by her “evil” stepsisters and stepmother.

    Even though I love Cinderella and many Disney movies, I noticed that pitting women against one another is a recurring theme in many movies and TV shows I loved watching as a teenage girl. From Cinderella to Mean Girls to Gossip Girl, the central theme of these stories was girl hate in the form of backstabbing, jealousy, and betrayal.

    As I was writing this blog, I couldn’t help but think about how deeply these narratives contribute to the ridiculous idea that there’s only room for ONE woman to succeed and have it all. We’re being taught to compete and tear each other down from a young age.

    Let’s not forget that the target audience for these movies is teenage girls. Now, imagine the impact of these subliminal messages on teenage girls who internalize them.

    And you know what’s the worst part? It doesn’t just end in the teenage years.

    The girl hate manifests itself into woman hate. I have seen this happen in my family and am not proud of it. But I also don’t want to be a 45-year-old woman hating on teenage girls or other women.

    I can’t help but wonder if this is a result of a subliminal patriarchy at work or a competition of our own making. What I do know is that we’re stronger when we support each other.

    So, let’s talk about how to get rid of jealousy and resentment toward each other.

     

    1) Try Girl Love

    Remember when Blair and Serena put aside their jealousy, resentment, and insecurities and became unstoppable together?

    Back in high school, I had a serious hatred for this girl I barely knew. We both didn’t like each other. It was so dramatic. Until one day, we bonded over a book. To this day, she’s one of my closest friends. The funniest part? I don’t even remember why I hated her so much. Her friendship and support are some of the best things I’ve experienced in life. Magic happens when women come together to love each other and celebrate the sisterhood.  

    Women have a fundamental responsibility to care for other women. When one of us says she’s struggling, we should offer support and kindness, not judgment.

    And, if a woman is confident and has high self-esteem does not mean she’s a bitch or a slut, or she’s better than you. She’s just confident in her skin. Last time I checked, being confident is not a crime. Personally, I  refuse to live in a world where any woman with a healthy self-esteem is labelled a whore. As quoted from the legendary masterpiece that is Mean Girls, “you all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it okay for guys to call you sluts and whores.”

     

    2) Separate girl hate from real hate

    We should first look to our girl hate’s structural and social origins to push for some serious change. Instead of chastising every girl who might not be like you or, as seems to be the case more often, might be too much like you.

    Why are we jealous of girls who are more pretty, smart, or successful?  It’s time to break free from that toxic, loser mindset. If you see a girl trying to be the best version of herself,  don’t be bitter; get better.

    I’ve struggled with feelings of jealousy and resentment, too. Trust me, it’s a disease. Often, that girl we hate so much just reminds us of what we could be because she’s actively working on herself.

    I am unlearning the narrative that only ONE woman can have it all. There’s so much for all of us, so we don’t have to hate and compete with each other. I have realized that my jealousy and resentment came from my insecurities.

    So, I put all this jealousy energy into growing and improving myself.

     

    3) Realize it has nothing to do with her

    I remember when I was younger, I was obsessed with hating this girl because she “stole” my man from me. I’d stalk her Instagram and Facebook and point out her flaws to make myself feel better. Eww, disgusting, I know. Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up.

    When I took the time to reflect on my messy behaviour, I realized that I thought she was better than me because she was my ex’s next girlfriend. It was some major insecurity on my part. So, ladies, break this terrible habit of gossiping, judging, comparing, and being jealous.

    I know I sound like a broken record when I say that someone else’s success does NOT highlight a failure in you. Someone’s happiness does not have to cancel out your own. I want people to say, ‘I’m really happy for you,’ not to be polite but because they bloody well mean it. 

    And, if not for anyone else, do it for yourself because hating people is stressful, negativity is tiring, and causing drama is dumb.

     

    4) Lastly, the most important thing to keep in mind

    She’s probably feeling insecure as well. As much as I love being a woman, I cannot deny that it’s fucking exhausting to be a woman. Somedays, I am just so tired of being a woman. Just think about all the societal pressures, family expectations, and hormonal changes we have to put up with.

    I recently read somewhere that women only have one week during which they feel good about themselves and their bodies. Come to think of it, it’s true in dealing with PMS, menstruation, and other hormonal changes, we are really deep in the trenches.

    I  want to end the post with these beautiful words by Maya Angelou,

    “Each one of us  have lived through  some devastation,  some loneliness, some weather superstorm or spiritual superstorm.  When we look  at each other we must say,  I understand.  I understand how you feel  because I have been there myself.  We must support  each other and empathize with each other  because each of us is more alike than we are unalike.“

     

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    Artwork by Katja Perez

  • Can You Be Friends With Your Ex

    Can You Be Friends With Your Ex

     

     

    It’s a classic rom-com trope we’ve all seen a million times. We’ve listened to a million love songs about it. And we’ve probably used “the line” at one point or another: “Let’s stay friends, okay?”.

    The idea of being friends with an ex can be complicated. You’ve likely experienced unforgettable, life-changing memories and intimacy with this person, so naturally, there’s a temptation to keep them in your life. Or, you may also be part of the same friendship circle, so avoiding them could mean having no social life.

    I don’t stay friends with my exes, and I avoid dating men who are still best friends with theirs. That’s my opinion, of course; everyone is different. The reason is that after a breakup, I want to heal and move on with my life fresh, without any emotional baggage from the past.

    Healing and growth require a fresh start, free from reminders of past relationships. How can you truly grow if you have a constant reminder of your past mistakes around you, keeping you in a rut?

    Another reason is that some feelings never go away, which is disrespectful to their new partner and my current partner. When I was young and naive, I thought staying friends with my ex after our breakup was a brilliant idea. At the time, it seemed like a good way to ease my pain, even if it was just a temporary fix.

    Looking back, I realize how wrong I was. Trying to be friends only led to more heartache and confusion. It was a tough lesson, but I learned the hard way that staying friends with an ex is usually a recipe for confusion and emotional rollercoasters.

    That so-called “friendship” not only kept me emotionally stuck, but it also held me back from growing personally and moving forward in my new relationship. So, why keep investing in something that’s already over? It’s like watering a dead plant – what’s the point?

    Of course, when you have kids with the person, it’s a different thing; your life will be tangled forever, so it’s good to have a good relationship. I have friends who are friends with their ex-husband.

    Before you consider being friends with your ex, ask yourself these important questions: Can you still be friends with your ex when they fall in love with someone else? Someone you don’t like? Someone else in your friend circle? If you can’t maintain strong boundaries when your relationship is over, or if it causes emotional distress, you’re not prepared to be an actual friend.

    In my experience, lovers and friends can only happen once no romantic feelings are left and no one has a hidden agenda. If you (or the other person) have any hopes of getting back together, it’s very difficult to develop a real friendship.

    While writing this post, I asked some friends for their opinions. Here are some of their responses-

    “I’m very close friends with an ex. I get along great with their partner, it’s no big deal. But we were virtually no contact after the breakup for about a year and a half. That was a proper healing time. Jumping straight back into friendship after a few months, I’m skeptical.”

     

    “I would be friends with my ex after four years of relationship. Even then, I suspect something could have happened between us. I don’t know if I can be friends with my ex. Maybe friends with benefits, but just friends is a no for me.”

     

    ” I am friends with all my exes because they are my friends who know me well and have several years of history together. They are worth their weight in gold as confidants who know me well. I don’t understand wanting to walk away from that just because I used to have sex with the person. As long as you can maintain healthy boundaries, why throw away a good friend just because you used to date?”

     

    “Some people are too valuable and cannot just be tossed aside, especially if the connection is on a much deeper level than the physical intimacy. There is a mutual understanding and appreciation that is rare to find. What’s the difference between a romantic and a platonic relationship? The physical intimacy. Why does everything else also have to be thrown out the window?”

     

    That being said, there’s one ex with whom I am friendly. We don’t see each other or talk often. But when we meet, it’s always pleasant and a good time. And, of course, it helps we weren’t in touch with each other for years. Now he’s happily married, he has no interest in trying to “win me back” or whatever, and I have no interest in dating him again. So, for us, it’s pretty easy to be friends.

    If you decide to be friends with your ex, then boundaries must be discussed and enforced. You cannot just observe how things go. Here are some things I would not do with my ex ever:

     

    1. Go out to dinner with, or drink with, him one on one;
    2. Discuss any aspect of my intimate life with him;
    3. Go into detail or reminisce about our relationship together;
    4. Discuss any problems or issues in my current relationship with him;
    5. Give him advice on any of his relationships, etc;

     

    There’s no right or wrong answer to this question. However, I am very curious to know your opinion on this. Can you ever truly be friends with your ex? Comment below :*

     

    xo

    Yachna

     

    Featured Image Credits- Pinterest